Step 1: Record your separation date
Your separation date is more important than most people realise. It starts the clock on time limits for property applications — 12 months from divorce for married couples, 24 months from separation for de facto couples. It also affects Centrelink entitlements, tax, and how assets are valued in a property settlement.
Write down the date, note it in a message to yourself, or send a brief email — something dated and retrievable. If you're separating under one roof, see our guide to separation under one roof for what else you'll need to document.
Step 2: Gather your financial documents
A property settlement requires a complete and honest picture of everything you own and owe, together and separately. Start collecting:
| Category | What to collect |
|---|---|
| Property | Recent valuations or sales data, mortgage statements, council rates notices |
| Superannuation | Latest statements for all super funds — both yours and your partner's |
| Bank accounts | Statements for all accounts — joint and individual — for the past 12–24 months |
| Income | Payslips, tax returns, business financials if self-employed |
| Investments | Share portfolios, managed funds, cryptocurrency holdings |
| Vehicles | Registration documents, finance contracts |
| Debts | Credit card statements, personal loan balances, HECS, any guarantees |
| Business interests | Trust deeds, company documents, accountant valuations |
Both parties are legally required to make full financial disclosure in any property settlement. Gathering your own documents early means you're not dependent on your former partner's cooperation later.
Step 3: Understand the full asset pool
The "asset pool" in a property settlement includes everything owned by either of you — jointly or individually — minus all liabilities. Under the Family Law Act 1975, assets acquired before the relationship, during it, and after separation may all be relevant. Make a list:
- The family home and any investment properties
- Superannuation for both parties (treated as a separate asset class)
- Bank savings and term deposits
- Shares, managed funds, cryptocurrency
- Vehicles, boats, caravans
- Businesses, trust interests, partnership shares
- Inheritances received (timing and use matters)
- All debts: mortgage, car loans, credit cards, personal loans
Step 4: Think clearly about the children
If you have children, their arrangements are the most important thing to get right — and the most emotionally charged. Before any conversations with your former partner, think through:
- Where the children would live day-to-day and who would do school drop-off and pick-up
- How time would be divided week to week, and over school holidays
- How major decisions — schooling, health, travel — would be made
- What the children's routines, friendships and activities are, and how to protect them
The Family Law Act requires that the best interests of the child are the paramount consideration in any parenting arrangement. Keeping that principle front of mind — rather than what feels fair to you as a parent — produces better outcomes and reduces conflict. See our parenting plan template for what a thorough arrangement covers.
Step 5: Protect your immediate financial position
While you're getting organised:
- Open a personal bank account in your own name if you don't already have one, and redirect your income to it
- Don't drain joint accounts — this is treated seriously by courts and will be held against you in a property settlement
- Update your will and superannuation beneficiary nominations — these don't change automatically on separation
- Notify Centrelink if you receive family payments — your entitlements change from the date of separation
- Review any joint insurances — home, contents, health — and consider your coverage going forward
Step 6: Understand your legal options early
Many people assume separation means lawyers and court. In most cases it doesn't have to. The options, roughly in order of cost and conflict:
| Option | Best for | Typical cost |
|---|---|---|
| Mediation | Most separating couples — property and parenting | $3,000–$8,000 total shared |
| Collaborative law | Where both parties have lawyers but want to avoid court | $10,000–$30,000 |
| Negotiation via lawyers | Complex matters or where one party won't engage | $15,000–$60,000+ |
| Contested court proceedings | Last resort — when nothing else works | $30,000–$150,000+ per side |
Mediation resolves over 90% of matters. Most people who try it avoid court entirely. Read more about family law mediation →
A note on safety
If your situation involves family violence or you feel unsafe, your safety comes first. Call 000 in an emergency. The 1800RESPECT helpline (1800 737 732) provides confidential support 24 hours a day. Mediation may not be appropriate where there is family violence — tell us about any safety concerns and we will advise the safest options, including arrangements where you and your former partner are never in the same room.
You don't need to have it all sorted before you call us
Most people contact us before they've gathered everything. A free initial consultation helps you understand what comes next, what to prioritise, and what mediation can realistically achieve in your situation — no obligation.